Best Books That Will Inspire Growth in INFJs
INFJs are book lovers. We love to read and we are constantly learning new things. Reading is definitely one of the INFJs favorite hobbies.
But instead of listing books about the INFJ personality type (since the information is already in abundance online), below is a list of books that INFJs might be interested in reading.
Even though INFJs have different tastes, we usually want to read something that helps us grow or understand ourselves.
For the non-fiction or self-help genre, we want something that is insightful or profound and not too factual or scientific. For fiction, we want a book with an inspiring story or characters that we empathize with and care for. More often than not, we want a book that helps us improve our lives or the people around us.
Below you will find a list of INFJ books, a mix of fiction and non-fiction that are suitable for different stages of our growth. The list is by no means exhaustive, considering how much an INFJ reads. So if you want more recommendations, you can check out my yearly book recommendations.
Bonus: My Book for INFJs
Note: The way I look at my books will never be the same as the way I look at other books, so to be fair I rather keep them off the list.
Reconnect to Love by Yong Kang Chan
Even though this book has no mention of the word, INFJ. I wrote this book with INFJ in mind. Many of my INFJ readers have shared with me that they desire a deeper connection with other people. It’s not that they don’t have friends but their friendships tend to be superficial and not as meaningful as they desire. So this book is dedicated to them.
Some people feel lonely when they are alone. But for INFJs, we usually feel lonely when we are with other people or groups. Our loneliness occurs when we realize we don’t fit in or others don’t understand us.
In this book, I share how we can connect deeply within first so that when we approach our relationship, we don’t feel a sense of loneliness and disappointment.
Top 10 Best INFJ Books
Disclosure: Please note that the links below are affiliate links. I will earn a commission if you decide to make a purchase, but it will be at no additional cost to you.
1. Please Understand Me II by David Keirsey
If you have difficulties getting along with other types, this book will help you understand how.
Published in 1998, this old classic is unlike most other MBTI books. Instead of discussing the 16 personality types individually, the author divides the 16 MBTI types into four meaningful temperaments and discusses each temperament as a whole. The four groups are Artisans (SP types), Guardians (SJ types), Idealists (NF types), and Rationals (NT types).
Understanding these temperaments will give you a better knowledge of yourself, your significant others, your children, and the people you work with. Also, read his first book, Please Understand Me, if you want to understand why you are so different from the rest.
2. The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron
Most INFJs are highly sensitive people (HSP) too. We tend to be easily overwhelmed by strong sensory inputs such as loud sounds, strong smells, and bright light. Other people’s moods also tend to affect us.
If you are unsure if you are a highly sensitive person (HSP), this book has self-assessment tests to help you determine if you are an HSP and identify your particular sensitivities.
Based on scientific research and hundreds of interviews, you will learn how to handle the overstimulation of your nervous system and ways to reframe your past experiences in this book. There is also advice for typical problems that some HSPs face such as shyness and difficulty finding the right kind of work.
3. Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
If you are an INFJ who is constantly seeking meaning or purpose in your life, this book will address your existential crisis and give you a new perspective of life.
This memoir describes the author’s life in Nazi death camps and its lessons for spiritual survival. At first, you might feel uncomfortable with the vivid descriptions of the concentration camp experiences. However, by the end of the book, you will deeply appreciate our innate ability as humans to rise above all sufferings.
You will understand that when people have developed a strong purpose, they can do anything such as getting out of bed every morning to face another unbearable day of harsh conditions. Reading this book will get you reflecting on your existence in this world.
4. Quiet by Susan Cain
Written by an INFP author, this book is probably the most popular book among introverts.
In this book, the author explains how the schools, workplaces, and religious institutions in the US are designed for extroverts and how this makes introverts feel like there’s something with them.
Spending five years researching about introversion, the author shares many examples of successful introverts and how they contribute greatly to society. She also shares her own challenges practicing corporate law on Wall Street and other stories as an introvert.
If you are unable to see your gifts as an introvert or you feel like you have to pretend to be an extrovert to survive in this world, this book will help you accept your introverted personality.
5. Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay Gibson
This book is suitable for INFJs who experience childhood emotional neglect and have difficulties relating to their parents.
INFJs tend to be emotionally sensitive but our parents might not be equipped with the necessary empathy and emotional responsiveness to meet our emotional needs as a child. Hence, many of us grow up feeling invisible, lonely, and disappointed with our relationships.
Neglect is unlike abuse. Most of the time, neglected children don’t know that they are neglected. They just grew up feeling or thinking that their needs aren’t as important as other people.
Reading this book will give you new insights into personality and help you understand how your past shaped your current behaviors.
6. Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
INFJs value relationships. We desire peace and harmony in all our relationships. We seek to understand our partner, friends, and family better, and we spend a lot of time thinking about how to improve our relationships with others.
An interesting book about attachment styles in romantic and platonic relationships. This book will help you understand why your relationships often didn’t work out even though there is a strong attraction in the beginning.
In this book, there are three main attachment styles: secure, anxious, and avoidant. If you feel insecure or overwhelmed in your relationship, this book will provide you with some advice to build stronger, more fulfilling connections and help you move towards a more secure attachment style.
7. Siddhartha by Herman Hesse
If you are looking for a spiritually uplifting book, this book is for you.
Popular among INFJs, this short novel is about the son of a wealthy Brahmin family, Siddhartha, who despite all the love he’s receiving feels discontent. One day, he decides to leave his home on a journey to find spiritual enlightenment. He is joined by his best friend, Govinda, and both of them renounce their earthly possessions.
This book addresses the conflicting dualities that INFJs often face. To live a life of spirituality or human desires? Seek more knowledge or listen to your own intuitive knowing? Reading this simple story about one man’s search for meaning in life and his road to self-discovery will help you slow down and reflect on your life.
8. Tao Te Ching by Lao Tze
Written more than two thousand years ago, this Chinese classic is one of the most translated books of all time.
This book speaks to INFJs because it bypasses the analytical mind. With introverted intuition as our dominant function, INFJs intuitively know things but we don’t always have a logical explanation to what we know.
Other personality types might find the text ambiguous and confusing. But for a personality type with contradictory traits, INFJs will find it easier to relate to the non-duality way of life found in this book or any other Taoism books.
There are many versions of this book, the one linked below is translated by Gia-Fu Feng and Jane English. It has beautiful monochrome photographs of nature that appeal to INFJs.
9. Personality Types by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson
If you have been studying Myers Briggs Personality Types for a while now and you want to understand yourself a little deeper, read enneagram books.
Unlike MBTI, Enneagram goes much deeper than our mental processes. For example, in this book, the authors help you to understand your innate fear, desire, and motivation better.
For Enneagram, there are nine different personality types. The authors give you a glimpse of how each type behaves at their best and their worst. In each chapter, they divide each type into nine levels of development. Reading this book will help you become more aware of yourself and your unhealthy, subconscious behaviors.
10. Wonder by R. J. Palacio
This bestseller novel is about the acceptance of facial differences.
August Pullman was born with a rare medical facial deformity and he was home-schooled. When he entered the fifth grade in a mainstream school for the first time, he stood out from the rest and was initially ostracized by nearly all the students.
Made into a movie starring Julia Roberts and Owen Wilson, this heartwarming story touches several themes such as family, friendships, courage, identity, and kindness.
Apart from empathizing with the characters, INFJs will resonate with this story because we often feel different from other people. If you ever feel like you don’t fit in or belong, this book will move you.